


Sander, Sander, Sander, and a psycho.

by Just_Another_Weirdo



Category: Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe, Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Being an Asshole, Attempted Murder, Attempted Suicide, M/M, Past Child Abuse, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit | Janus Sanders, Teenage Drama, Unsympathetic Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, sorry about that
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-02-24 19:47:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22163431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_Another_Weirdo/pseuds/Just_Another_Weirdo
Summary: And yet another Heathers au! I made a few changes, though...When Logan joins the theatre play as the main role himself, he never expected things to end this way. He never expected to get a psycho as a boyfriend, but here we were, first day of senior year! And he looked at all this kids he knew his whole life and wondered, what happened?
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders
Comments: 10
Kudos: 23





	1. Beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> This started with me being annoyed that in every Heather au, the colours didn't match. So I made them match. The characters that don't have their colours in the musical, I made them up.  
> Also, I changed the story and took a lot of creative liberties, so it isn't as the original.

“September 1st, 2020  
Dear Diary,”  
Logan glanced at the page. What to write? What to say?  
“I believe I’m a good person. You know, I think there’s good in everyone, but–here we are! First day of senior year!” He looked around, checking that no one saw the small nerd writing in his new diary between lockers. “And uh… I look around at these kids that I’ve known all my life and I ask myself– what happened?”  
He moved into the hallway, hearing the insults thrown back and forth between almost everyone. It was so loud.  
“Freak!”“Slut!” “Burnout!” “Bug-eyes!” “Poser!” “Lard-ass!”  
He felt himself shrink, remembering old times.  
“We were so tiny, happy and shiny, playing tag and getting chased”  
Yet the shouting continued. Louder, even.  
“Freak!” “Slut!” “Loser!” “Short-bus!”  
“Singing and clapping, laughing and napping, baking cookies, eating paste”  
Someone yelled at him.  
“Bull-dyke!” “Stuck-up!” “Hunchback!”  
He kept walking, making his way through the crowd.  
“Then we got bigger, that was the trigger, like the Huns invading Rome.” He pushed someone by accident. “Oh, sorry!” He exited the crowd, finally arriving to his locker. “Welcome to my school, this ain’t no high school. This is the Thunderdome.” He opened it, causing most of his stuff to almost fall. “Hold your breath and count days, we’re graduating soon” He started getting his books as fast as he could.  
“White trash!” Someone yelled at him.  
“College will be paradise, if I’m not dead by June!” He slammed the door closed.  
“But I know, I know, life can be beautiful.” He relied on his locket, looking at everyone around him. “I pray, I pray for a better way. If we changed back then, we could change again. We can be beautiful…” He bumped into someone. “Just not today.” He tried to help. “Hey, are you okay?”  
The kid only looked at him with disgust. “Get away, nerd!”  
“Oh, okay…” Logan backed away.  
“Freak!” “Slut!” “Homo!” “Homo!” “Homo!”  
“Things will get better, soon as my letter, comes from Harvard, Duke or Brown. Wake from this coma, take my diploma, then I can blow this town.” He started walking faster, not bothering to listen to any asshole on the way. “Dream of ivy-covered walls and smoky French cafés.” He almost bumped into Remy.  
“Shit, sorry!” He said, rushing somewhere else.  
He watched as some other football player chased him. “Fight the urge to strike a match and set this dump ablaze!”  
And then Remy crashed into Logan, dropping all his books.  
“No! God, sorry…” He apologized, grabbing his sunglasses before helping him.  
“Remy Sleep, third year as linebacker and eighth year of smacking lunch trays for being a huge clumsy” Logan greeted him, tiredness and sarcasm slipping into his voice.  
Remy chuckled, relaxing a bit. “Can I help you pick them up, Lo?”  
Logan shook his head “No! No, thanks!” He picked them up and continued his way. If there still were nice people like Remy, though he was bitchy sometimes, maybe hope wasn’t lost.  
“But I know, I know, I know, Life can be beautiful. I pray, I pray, I pray, for a better way. We were kind before, we can be kind once more. We can be beautiful…”  
Someone pocked him in the elbow. Logan almost jumps. “Agh! Hey Patton”  
Patton smiled, and waved his hand. “Hey”  
“Patton Dunnstock, my best friend since diapers.” Logan commented, looking at the his friend fondly.  
Patton chuckled. “We on for movie nigh?”  
“Yeah, you’re on Jiffy Pop detail”  
Patton smiled even more. “I rented “The Princess Bride””  
Logan held back a laugh. “Ha, again? Wait, don’t you have it memorized by now?”  
Patton shrugged. “What can I say? I’m a sucker for a happy ending”  
Before Logan could reply, he heard someone scream. “Patton Dunnstock! Get out of the way!” He turned to see Emile, who had just lost control of his skateboard. They crashed, fell into the ground, and the board kept rolling until it was out of sight. “Shit!” He said, getting up immediately.  
Logan crouched and helped Patton up. “Emile Foster, quarterback.” He greeted as he had greeted Remy before. “He is the nicest guy on the football team, which is, kind of, the only reason why he’s there.”  
Emile started helping Patton with his things. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to!” Patton blushed as he always did when he was around the quarterback wanna be.  
Remy and Emile were the only nice members of the football team. In fact, one of the other members, with a mocking tone, approached and yelled at Emile. “Hey! Pick that up! Right now!” They proceeded to laugh.  
Emile stepped away, not wanting to get into a fight. “I’m sorry, I was just trying to follow Remy, I swear.”  
Logan sighted. “Let him be, he’s actually helping, not like others.” He pointed at the guy’s chest, rising to his height. “On the other hand, you’re a high-school has been waiting to happen. A future gas station attendant.”  
He only obtained a smile and a shove. “You have a zit right there” he stated, laughing.  
People started laughing. Emile ran away to find Remy. Patton hid his blushing with his arms. Logan opened his diary again, not bothering to think about what they would said.  
“Dear diary,  
Why?”  
“Why do they hate me?” Asked Emile, looking for Remy.  
“Why don’t I fight back?” Wondered Patton, hearing the laughs of his classmates.  
“Why do I act like such a creep?” Said Virgil, observing from the shadows  
“Why?” Cried Logan once more.  
“Why won’t he date me?” Asked Remy, trying to find Emile.  
“Why did I hit him?” Wondered Remus, scared of himself.  
“Why do I cry myself to sleep?” Said Deceit, stroking his cheek.  
“Why?” Cried Logan one last time.  
“Somebody hug me!” Patton begged.  
“Somebody fix me!” Remus asked.  
“Somebody save me!” Deceit cried.  
“Send me a sign, God!” Roman prayed.  
“Give me some hope, here!” He said again.  
“Something to live for!” Virgil hoped.  
The laughter stoped. Everyone turned to the table. They were there. No one had noticed, but they had been there the whole time.  
“Sander, Sander, and Sander” Everyone chanted.  
Logan looked at them, envious. “And then there’s the brothers, they float above it all” he said, to no one but himself.  
“I love, Sander, Sander, and Sander” And who wouldn’t?  
“Deceit Sander, technically adopted.” Logan said, eyeing the yellow figure. He was hiding his scars with his gloved hand. “His dad was abusive, that’s how he got the scars.”  
“Remus Sander, runs the theatre club.” Logan moved to the green figure, who was shoving spaghettis up his nose in an attempt to cheer the yellow one. “Very creepy sometimes, but he did manage to adopt Dee.”  
“And Roman Sander, the dramaturg.” Logan moved to the red one. He was holding back his laughter. “He’s a mythic dramaqueen.”  
“They’re solid Teflon, never bothered, never harassed. I would give anything to be like that.” Logan finished, looking at the three of them as a whole.  
“I’d like to be their girlfriend” Sighted one girl, unaware of the gayness emanating out of everyone.  
“If I sat at their table, I’d get a role in a play” Said a shy girl.  
“I’d like them to be less weird” Wished another football player.  
“I’d like to kidnap a Sander and photograph him naked in an abandoned warehouse and leave him tied up for the rats.” Said that one weirdo that not even Remus could agree with.

{∞}

“Hurry up, Deceit, the bell has just rang” Roman said, waiting for his brother to exit the changing room.  
Deceit answered from the other side, fighting to zip the goddamn dress. “Maybe you should be Christine, Remus”  
Remus, who was playing with a fake limb prop from another play. “No, Dee, I don’t have the range” Deceit looked at himself in the mirror. He wished Christine wore gloves in the opera. “What about Roman? I thought you wanted to be Christine…”  
Roman sighted, growing impatient. “Yeah, but one of the Heathers said you had to do the Phantom ‘cause your scars. So I flipped her off. I’ll be Meg, she’s also important.” He was already in costume.  
Remus threw the limb away. “But if I’m Raoul, shouldn’t you be the phantom?”  
Roman blushed at the suggestion. “Yeah, I should, but I’d have to kiss Dee, and that’s incest…? I dunno if it counts as incest if it’s with an adopted brother…”  
Before he could keep wondering when it counted as incest and when it did not, the theatre teacher chimed in.  
Thomas looked at the three of them. He held the fake limb Remus had thrown. “Ah, Sander and Sander… and Sander.” He added, when Deceit exited. “Perhaps you didn’t hear the bell over all the gossiping. You’re late for class.”  
Roman started talking defensively. “Deceit is testing his costume, we’re helping him.”  
The teacher looked at them, tired of all their bullshit. “You need a hall pass, you know?. Don’t make me give you week’s detention.”  
Logan, who had been watching from behind, chimed in with a note. “Um, actually, Mr Sanders, all four of us are out on a hall pass, Theatre committee.”  
Mr Sanders read the note. “I see you’re all listed. Hurry up and finish what you’re doing.” He gave the note back to Logan and walked away.  
Roman took the note and read it too. “This is an excellent forgery, Logan, right?” He looked at him with admiration. Remus snatched the note.  
“Yeah… Logan… Berry. I crave a boon”  
“What boon?” Roman asked.  
“Give a role in the play, this summer. Just once, no singing necessary. If the teachers think that I joined you guys, then they’ll give me extra credit.” He looked at them with pleading eyes. “Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips, and absence notes.”  
Remus chimed in, giving the note back to Logan. “How about prescriptions?”  
“Not now, Remus”  
“Sorry, Roman”  
Roman took Logan by the chin, forcing him to look at his eyes. “For someone who doesn’t sing, you do have good vocal range”  
Deceit approached, brushing his side softly “And a good voice. I’ve heard you singing when you thought you were alone, it was quite good.” He stepped away, shyly. “It’d be perfect with practice.”  
Remus leaned between his brothers, grinning “Of course, we’d need to test your costume”“And you know, you know, you know, this could be beautiful.” Roman started. “Practice, maybe some tutoring, and we’re on our way. Get this boy his mask, and brother I need that tux.” Deceit grabbed the mask while Remus ran to get another tux. “Let’s make him lead role”  
“Let’s make him lead role” Dee said, grasping the mask tightly.  
“Let’s make him lead role” Remus joined.  
“Make him lead role… Okay?” Roman asked, taking the mask and the tux.  
Logan smiled. “Ok!”

{∞}

The hallway to the auditorium was chaos. Patton tried to pass unnoticed. Where was Logan?  
He heard screaming, and shouting. Honestly, this wasn’t new, so why was he so upset by it?  
“Out of my way geek!” Someone yelled. Patton took a moment to check it wasn’t at him.  
It was at Emile. “I don’t want trouble” he excused himself.  
“You’re gonna die at 3pm” the same student threatened.  
Remy, who had watched the whole scene, tried to approached, only to bump with a girl. She pushed him to the ground.  
“Don’t you dare touch me, get away pervert!” She yelled at him.  
Remy took his glasses before anyone stepped on them “What did I ever do to them?”  
“Who could survive this?”  
“I can’t escape this!”  
“I think I’m dying!”  
“Who’s playing the main cast?” Mr Sanders asked, louder than the turmoil.  
Everyone redirected their attention to the curtain going up, and the figures presenting themselves.  
“Sander, Sander, Sander… and someone” They sang, watching Deceit presenting himself as Christine Daae  
“Sander, Sander, Sander… and a babe” They kept it up, as Remus stepped next to his brother as the Viscount D’Chanty.  
“Sander, Sander, Sander…” They finished, watching Roman appear as Meg.  
Patton looked at the Phantom, recognizing his friend. “Logan?”  
“Logan? Logan? Logan!” Everyone chanted.  
Logan smiled, twirling around. “And you know, you know, you know, life can be beautiful.” He felt confident, so confident, he danced around the three brothers, even spinning Deceit, who answered with giggles. “You hope, you dream, you pray, and you get your way!” He ran to the edge, to grab Patton into the stage to. “Ask me how it feels, looking like hell on wheels.” The brothers approached to the edge, laughing at one of Remus’ jokes. They joined the couple. “My god it’s beautiful, I might be beautiful, and when you’re beautiful…” Logan took some air, ready to scream. “It’s a beautiful frickin’ day!”.


	2. Candy store

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If he wants to be the lead role, he ought to go to rehearsals, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, I had... things going on

“Dear diary, it’s been three weeks since I was given the lead role with the brothers. It’s been… alright, I guess. They’re nicer than I expected.”   
Logan pushed his glasses back to place. “Playing the role of Erik has been harder than anticipated. Roman has offered me tutoring. I missed a few practices to be with Patton, but I’m sure there are enough songs to practice without me.”   
Logan closed the journal as Patton approached. He smiled at his friend. They sat down together and chatted.  
“Hey Logan, what did the ocean tell to the sea?” Patton asked out of nowhere.   
Logan seemed puzzled. “Oceans don’t talk…?”   
“Nothing, he just waved!” Patton said, giggling. Logan took a moment to catch the joke. “Oh.. Oh! That’s… clever.”   
Patton smiled. “So, how’s the musical going?”   
“Average. I’m quite disappointed that Erik’s name isn’t mentioned. Or that Daroga doesn’t appear…” Logan shrugged, looking to the ground. “It’s ok, it raises my grades.” He looked back at his friend.   
“Do you think I could help as a choir member or something? I just feel like I take all your time from rehearsals, and I don’t wanna do that.”  
“Aw, Patton, you don’t need to worry. There are plenty of songs where the Phantom isn’t needed, it’s okey.”

[∞]

Deceit rushed through the hallway. Where was Logan? He was lucky he was not wearing his dress, it would have slowed him down. He had to find Logan. If he had to listen to Heather Duke destroying Prima Donna once more, he would defenestrate himself. Yeet himself out of the goddamn window.   
He found him, talking with a friend. Small, bubbly and with glasses… That must’ve been Patton. So that’s why he’s missing rehearsal? To talk to a friend he saw every day? Deceit was going to kill him.   
He approached Logan. The lead role didn’t seem to notice him, to engulfed in a conversation about criticizing one of the teachers. Deceit was tempted to push him. Instead, he poked his shoulder. “You’re missing rehearsal. We need to practise”   
Logan looked slightly annoyed. “Deceit, I’m having a conversation here…”   
“Yeah, and I’m having to listen to Heather destroy a beautiful piece. People can always get what they want, Logan, now come rehearse. You can talk to your boyfriend later” Deceit said, grabbing his arm and pulling him to his feet. Logan went red and glanced over Patton, whose face was in a similar situation.   
“He’s not my boyfriend”   
“Honestly, honey?” Said deceit, pulling him to rehearsal “I don’t give a fuck.”

When they arrived, Deceit wished there were any windows in the auditorium. There weren’t. So the ‘yeeting myself out of the school’ plan wasn’t going to work.   
Remus was on stage, with Heather and the two other students who played the managers too. And that other guy that accompanied Carlota. What was his name anyways?   
Roman, who was sitting on the third row, eyed Logan as soon as they walked in. “You’re late. And I need you to forge something for us, dear.” He greeted him.  
“What is it?”   
“An invitation to the jock’s party. Ya know Sweeney’s handwriting, right?”   
“I don’t think that’s a… good idea” Logan said. “Wouldn’t he know who he invited and who he didn’t?”   
Deceit huffed with amusement. “He’ll be so drunk he won’t even remember his birthday.”   
“Besides, you own us a favour after missing four practices.” Roman pointed out, a little more harsh that he had intended.   
“I don’t owe you anything” Logan said. “You were fine without me in rehearsals.”   
“Just write the goddamn note” Deceit hissed. So Logan did. He told himself he did it because he wanted to go to the party, but deep down he knew he also felt guilty for missing rehearsals.   
Roman read the note and hummed approvingly. “Dee, be a dear and photocopy this…” He stopped to count. “seven times should be enough.”   
“Wait” Logan said. “Who else are we inviting?” He watched Dee go away hastily. He was starting to regret this.   
“Emile and Remy, as always. And Patton, since you seem so keen on spending time with him rather than with us.”   
“Wait, you can’t invite Patton!” He complained.   
Roman raised an eyebrow. “Oh, and why not? Isn’t he your friend?”   
“He is!” Logan snapped. “But a social event of that magnitude means that there will be alcohol or worse and Patton is easily influenced! I don’t want him to get hurt!”   
“Relax, Specs. It isn’t such a big deal” Roman waved it off.   
“Not for you, the most popular boy at school, but some of us actually come off stage sometimes!” Logan shouted.

Everything felt silent. Where were the voices singing in the background now?   
Roman froze. “Are we gonna have a problem? You got a bone to pick? You've come so far why now are you pulling on my dick? I’d normally slap your face off”   
Everyone was watching them. Deceit was back. “And everyone here could watch” Remus jumped down the stage, fell face first to the ground and then ran to see what was happening.   
“But I'm feeling nice, here's some advice, listen up beeyotch” Roman finished, pulling Logan to the stage. Logan noticed everyone else had left. It was only him and the brothers, who looked mad. Especially Deceit.   
“I like” They said. No, they sang. They were singing now?   
“Lookin’ hot, wearing stuff they can not” Roman started, at the centre of the trio.   
“I like” “Singing high, playing gender bent roles” Remus said, despite that this time he was playing a male role.   
“I like” “Skippin’ gym” Deceit said, walking around Logan.   
“Scarin’ her” Remus jumped behind Logan, when did he get there?   
“Screwin’ him” Roman sang, grabbing Logan by the chin–despite Logan being taller.   
“I like”   
“Killer clothes, being called for lead role” Deceit sang, emphasizing the high notes.   
Remus slapped Logan in the ass playfully.“If you lack the balls, you can go play dolls, let your mommy fix you a snack”  
“Or you could come sing, practise a little bit” Roman offered, nudging his brother back.   
“Cause you ain’t perfect, bitch” Deceit hissed, pushing Logan back.   
“Honey what you waitin' for? Welcome to my candy store! Time for you to prove you're not a loser anymore, and step into my candy store.”   
“Girls fall” Roman started.   
“At your feet” Remus sang.  
“Come rehearse” Deceit bitterly added.   
“Help you sing” Roman said.  
“All you have to do: Spend some time with us too” Deceit practically hissed that entire line. Logan was getting more confused than he was before. Why were they singing?   
“Your friend’ll understand if he loves you in the end. If he had your shot, you would understand too” Roman said. Logan had to admit he held a convincing argument. He sang a convincing argument.  
“‘Course if you don't care, fine! Go braid his hair, maybe Sesame Street is on” Remus teased   
“Or forget that shit” Deceit chimed in.   
“And get in my jeep, we can beat the stars tonight!” Roman pushed the other two to get in the middle.  
“Honey what you waitin' for? Welcome to my candy store! You just gotta prove you're not a pussy anymore, and step into my candy store”   
“You can join the team, or you can bitch and moan” Remus said, and thank god Roman chimed in before he could actually start to fake moan.   
“You can live the dream or you can die alone” Roman said, pressing a hand over his brother’s mouth so that he didn’t ruin the performance.   
“You can fly with eagles or if you prefer, keep on testing me and get out of here!” Deceit shouted, while at the back, Remus licked Roman hand and he started chasing him to kick his ass.

And it was now when Patton decided to enter the auditorium. He was holding one of the copies of the letter, Deceit must’ve given him one. He looked at them, seemingly failing to notice the background music. Logan was getting even more confused than before.   
“Logan, look! Ram invited us to his homecoming party! This proves he's not an asshole!” He said, beaming happiness and joy.   
Logan chocked, but he did managed a “Color me stoked” out of his mouth. They weren’t singing now. Why were they singing before?   
“I’m so happy!” Patton said, and Logan could actually believe him. Maybe this wasn’t a bad idea after all…   
“Honey what you waitin' for?” Remus started singing again, Roman looked pissed that he took his line but said nothing. And where did Patton go? “Step into my candy store! Time for you to prove you're not a lameass anymore”   
“And step into my candy store”   
“It’s my candy store”   
“It’s my candy”   
“It’s my candy store”   
“It’s my candy”   
“It’s my candy store”  
“It’s my candy store”

**[∞]**

“Ok, fine, I’ll come rehearse more.” Logan grunted, once they had finished.  
“Finally” “Neat!” “Great!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heathers au, aka, that one fanfic where everybody dies and Logan doesn't know why people are singing despite him singing too.


	3. Fight for me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus should know that threatening people comes with consequences.
> 
> And Logan doesn't understand feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize in advance about the messy fight scene. I tried to make it so I liked it, but I just couldn't.   
> Anyways, hope you enjoy this
> 
> Trigger warning, Remus says a nasty line, the f word twice, once as an insult and once quoting the insult, blood (I guess?) and mentions of past abuse. 
> 
> This is not as bad as it sounds, I swear.

“Damn you!” Logan sang, reading from the script as he had not memorized all the lyrics yet. “You little prying Pandora!” As he read, he didn’t notice Deceit flinching and stepping away from him. “You little demon, is this what you wanted to see? Curs—”

“Ok, Logan, stop.” Roman interrupted him, stepping into stage too.

Logan looked away from the sheet in his hands. “What did I do wrong now? I even followed Remus’ advice on characte– …oh” Roman had made his way to the stage, and he was now crouching next to Deceit. His brother was trembling slightly, trying so hard to keep it together.

Roman spoke with a voice so uncharacteristically soft. It was perhaps the first time Logan heard him talk without yelling or exaggerating. “Dee? Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, I’m perfectly…” He breathed in, trying to stop the shaking. “I’m ok. I just, don’t like the screaming”

“Wanna go change?” Roman said, standing up and lifting Deceit with him.

“But we haven’t finished…” Deceit complained.

“You’ve done enough, come on, let’s go change…” Roman lead his brother offstage, to the nearest bathroom. Meanwhile, Logan exchanged looks with Remus, who was eating a bar of chocolate he had found bellow a seat and watching from the first row.

“Is… Is Deceit alright?” Logan said, approaching Remus once his brothers had left.

“Not really… he gets triggered sometimes.” Remus said, shrugging as if it was normal. “He’s getting better, but it takes time” He finished the chocolate bar and threw the wrapping to the nearest bin. “I’m not really good at comforting him, so I just let Roman do his thing.”

Logan nodded in acknowledgement. He was aware of Deceit’s… past, and how he had become Remus’ brother. He had never thought about how it could still affect his new friend. It’s not like Dee liked talking about that, and Logan wouldn’t push.

God, Patton would’ve known what to do.

“He shouldn’t play Christine if he can’t stand some yelling.” Heather said, watching from the third row. Her friend, that jerk in the football team Remy had been complaining at lunch time about, hummed in agreement. He didn’t even look up from his phone.

“Excuse me?” Logan said, watching as Remus looked at her with a murderous glare.

Heather looked at her finger nail, feigning lack of concern. “He shouldn’t play Christine. He’s a guy, first of all. And he can’t even stand yelling without having an attack.”

“He should be the phantom with that ugly face. Heather should play Christine.” Her boyfriend said, actually bothering to look away of the phone where he had been playing all this time.

Remus jumped off stage. Logan followed quickly, holding his friend back. “Remus, don’t.” He didn’t want any more trouble.

“Wow, now I get why you’re Carlotta. You’re as insufferable as her. Or more.” A guy, sitting in the first row, commented. Logan had seen this guy at the back of every rehearsal.

“Pardon me? Mind your own business!” Heather said, walking to the aisle.

The guy watched her with a smirk. “You aren’t pardoned. Besides, you wouldn’t be able to even dream about reaching such high notes.”

“Better than that faggot, yes I would!” She said.

“Call my brother another name and I will rip your tongue and shove it up your ass” Remus said, grabbing Heather by her jacket an lowering her to his level. (You can take small trash boi out of my cold dead hands)

There was a brief moment of silence, when no one moved. Then, slowly, Heather raised her hand. She punched Remus in the face, sending him to the ground.

Logan was frozen in panic, and then everything started moving too fast. Remus jumped to his feet and punched Heather in the gut, who was not expecting Remus to fight back. Her boyfriend gripped Remus from behind, drawing him away from Heather. Remus struggled in his arms, kicking like a rabid raccoon.

And then the guy from before, the Trench Coat Guy™, pulled the jerk down, slamming him into one of the seats.

Then everything froze.

And I mean that in the most literal way.

Logan started hearing a chorus of students, repeating the same two words over and over. Like a chant.

He watched the scene, trying to figure out what was happening. Everyone had frozen. Everyone but him, he noticed as he walked up to Remus.

“Why when you see people fight, does it look so horrible and hurt so much?” He wondered in a tone that seemed song-ish. He hadn’t meant to sing, he couldn’t just help it.  
“I shouldn't watch this crap, I should call a teacher, but with this kid…” Logan looked at the Trench Coat Guy closer. He wasn’t a firm believer of love at first sight, in fact, he was against the idea. Yet…

“Damn…” He let go, stepping back.

And suddenly the fight continued, as if it had never been frozen.

Remus tackled Heather to the ground, and she quickly responded with a kick to the gut. Meanwhile, the jerk and the Tench Coat Guy exchanged punches, each one of them leading to a stronger response. It was chaos, and Logan should go tell a teacher. He had to.

And yet, he found himself talking to the frozen figure of the kid once more.

“Hey, mister no-name kid, so who might you be?” He wondered, wandering around the fight.  
“And could you fight for me?” Logan asked, knowing that fantasizing about a stranger was weird shit to do. “And hey, could you face the crowd, could you be seen with me and still act proud?” But he couldn’t help it, “Hey, could you hold my hand?” He had never been in a relationship before. “And could you carry me through no man's land?” And thinking about it was… a little too much.

“It’s fine if you don't agree but I would fight for you if you would fight for me” He said, stepping back from the figure. He had gotten to close and this felt weird enough with the singing and frozen people.

Remus got up from the ground and yelled something to Logan along the lines of ‘fucking help me, asshole’, only to be pushed into a seat by Heathers again. And not in a romantic way. But in a violent harmful way.

And then it froze again.

“Let them talk as they like, I don't care how much.” Logan found himself saying, brushing the cheek of the trench coat kid. “You can set my broken bones and I know CPR.” He drew back, in time to see how the kid punched Heather’s boyfriend into the ground and pushed Heather off Remus, switching rivals.

They froze mid punch, Remus kicking the jerk in the shin while the Trench Coat Guy punched Heather.

“Well, whoa, you can punch real good” Logan said, stating the obvious. “You’ve lasted longer than the average would”

“So hey, mister no-name kid, if some night you're available, wanna fight for me? If you're still alive. I would fight for you if you would fight for me” Logan stepped away, watching the end of the fight unfold. This was a mess. A low chant of students died out, just like at the beginning.

There was a moment of quiet, when everyone was too exhausted to keep fighting.

Then the drama teacher entered the auditorium, followed soon by Patton.

“What is the meaning of this?!” Mr. Sanders–include Thomas in your high school Aus, cowards– shouted, gaining the attention of the participants of the fight. “All of you, detention after school”

“She started it!” Remus shouted, pointing at Heather, who gave him a middle finger.

“He threatened me!” Heather said.

“You called his brother a faggot of course he threatened you, asshole!” The kid said, cleaning the blood of his nose with the back of his hand.

Logan approached, and offered him a handkerchief. “Here, eh… I didn’t catch your name”

The nameless kid looked at him for a moment before taking the piece of fabric and cleaning his face.

“Didn’t throw it” He said, “besides, who the hell has one of _these_ this days?” He asked, gesturing to the handkerchief.

“Apparently, I do” Logan said, looking briefly to Remus and the others, who were arguing with Thomas. “Why did you help Remus?”

“Why didn’t you?” He asked, and Logan didn’t know what to answer. “I’d love to keep talking, but I’ve got a detention to attend.”

Logan could only watch as the kid left the auditorium. He wondered what he had been doing here in the first time. Holding the handkerchief close to his chest, hearing Heather arguing with Mr. Sanders, he was left trying to understand this… feelings.

Feelings, the bane of his existence.

“What happened here?” Roman asked, once he and Deceit were back.

Logan looked at him and then looked at where Remus had been fighting. “Heather was been a bitch, Remus threatened her, and the argument soon evolved into a violent quarrel. He’s got detention now”

“So…” Deceit said “The usual Wednesday?”

“The usual Wednesday.” Roman affirmed.

“And Logan talked to a cute boy” Patton mentioned, making Logan blush.

“I most certainly did not!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may say, but Weirdo, it's quarantine! You should have enough time to write!  
> Working from home is a lot harder than working at the usual place, and while it's quieter, I hate it.  
> So you'll have to wait another year for me to update.   
> Thanks for reading, bye!


	4. Freeze your brain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan catching feelings.  
> Everyone's gay here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why do I take so long to post?  
> Because I have a mess of a life, that's why
> 
> Hope you enjoy

Entering the school, something seemed wrong. Logan couldn’t exactly point out what was odd about the environment in the hallways. Everything was number. As if people had lost the will to speak and shout and yell at each other as every other day. It was almost quiet.

If you had told Logan that the school would be silent the next day he would’ve scoffed at you. And then given you many reasons why this was impossible.  
But now everyone was rather whispering and talking so quietly than shouting as they used to.

Logan walked through the halls, early for once. Knowing the Sander brothers they would be late. Patton, on the other hand, was waiting him by his locker as always.  
“Have you heard?” Patton asked Logan as he saw him, uncharacteristically rushed.  
“Yes, I heard you alright. I’m not deaf.” Logan answered, leaning against the lockers.  
Patton rolled his eyes. “I meant the news, Logan”

“Oh. My apologies. No, I don’t think I heard them.” Logan said.  
Patton’s tone lowered considerably. “There was an accident last night. Do you remember Heather Duke?”  
“Yeah, she hasn’t been in any rehearsals since the fight with Remus. He’s still in detention…” Logan said, recalling the events that happened last week. “What happened to her?”

“She’s, god, she died.” Patton said, looking away as he hugged himself. “There’s several versions, some say she was hit by a car after an argument with her boyfriend. Others say she was drunk. Others say it was… well, intentional.”

Logan place a hand in his shoulder. “Hey, look at me” He pulled Patton into a hug. “It’s ok, we’ll be ok. You can cry if you like.”  
“It’s stupid, I didn’t even like her as a person” Patton mumbled against Logan.  
“Yeah, she was rude. But that doesn’t mean she deserved to die.”

They stayed like this for a while, resting against the locker as Patton cried into Logan’s shirt. They separated once the bell rang, walking into class.  
Every student was making questions to each others, whispering answers that were probably distant from the truth. The teachers ignored the questions for most of the day. Then at the end of third period, right before recess, the headmistress informed them that the school was making a memorial this weekend, and that any participation was appreciated.  
Logan wasn’t sure if he would collaborate.

“I can’t really think she died. I mean, her boyfriend would be more affected if he really cared, and he’s just… there” Remy said, splashing his drink in the table as he gestured towards Heather’s boyfriend, who was talking to his friends in the football team. “He never liked her, he liked the popularity and now that she’s dead he’ll probably start dating the next more pretty or popular chick. I just, I can’t understand it.”

“He’s an asshole. She was an asshole. Perfect couple, without love” Remus said, playing with the squid in his sandwich.  
“People have different ways of expressing grief, Remy.” Emile said. “Besides, you shouldn’t talk of Sweeney like that. He’s our teammate.”  
“You guys know he only tolerates you because you’re the coach’s favourites, right?” Roman said.  
“Yeah, of course we do. They don’t stop reminding us.” Remy said, taking another sip from his coffee.  
Emile sighted. “I only wanted to play football and have fun…”

“I don’t think it was an accident” Deceit muttered, eyes fixed in his untouched food.  
Roman took his brother’s knife out of his hand so he stopped stabbing the squid. Remus diverted his attention to Deceit, along with the rest.  
Deceit looked at the others. “I don’t think it was accidental. Or suicide.”  
“Then what could it be?” Patton asked.

“Are you implying…?” Logan wondered, not daring to finish.  
Deceit scoffed. “Murder? It sounds possible. Duke wasn’t suicidal. And she didn’t like alcohol.”  
Remy raised an eyebrow “how do you know that?”

“She never stop talking during rehearsals. All the time, it made me want to reap her vocal cords and set them on fire.” Remus said.  
Roman made a face at the comment, “gross, but true. She talked so goddamn much.”  
“Who would’ve killed her? She didn’t do anything!” Patton said.

Logan watched as his friends discussed the situation. He hadn’t processed fully the situation yet. Suddenly, well, not really suddenly, more like a gradual increase he didn’t realize until now, the voices of his friends were too loud. “I’m leaving for a drink, I’ll be back soon.” He excused himself and left.

Maybe they waved him goodbye as he left, or maybe they ignored him. Logan couldn’t tell, everything was too loud. He walked through the crowd of students in the cafeteria and entered the nearest store. A seven eleven. They had slushies. Logan could use one right now.  
He rested his back against the wall and loudly sighted. As he drank part of his drink he slid down until he was nearly sitting. He could stay this way forever, if only the floor wasn’t so unclean.

He opened his eyes when he felt someone taking his drink from his hands. Crouched in front of him, inspecting Logan’s drink, was the Trench Coat Guy from last week. He had stopped coming to the auditorium.  
“You have good taste” he said, giving Logan the drink back. Logan stared at him, saying nothing. “Ok, could you please say something? You’re giving me anxiety. I didn’t do anything wrong, did I?”

“What? No! Sorry, I just… didn’t expect you here…” Logan said, clumsily rising to his feet. He patted the dust from his pants. “I’m Logan. Logan Berry” Logan offered him his hands.  
“Virgil Storm.” The kid said, ignoring completely his hand.  
There was an awkward moment of silence, as Virgil went to get his own drink and Logan just watched him.

“So… eh… you’re new to the school, right?” Logan said, attempting to start a normal conversation.  
Virgil scoffed. “Yeah, this is like my tenth school. Dad’s got a different job here so we moved, again. I doubt we’ll stay for too long, though. He always gets… never mind, it’s not important.” Virgil’s voice was soothing, but he seemed to just lack the confidence to talk louder. It resulted in a quiet soothing voice. Logan liked it.  
“You can ramble if you like. I just need to stop thinking about… you know” Logan gestured vaguely. “And Emile, a friend of mine, said that venting sometimes helps with stress.”

“Do you really want to know my life? We barely know each other.” Virgil said, playing with the straw on his drink.  
Logan shrugged. “How are we going to get to know each other if we don’t talk?”

“Touché” Virgil said. “So, basically… I've been through ten high schools.” Virgil sang, and gods Logan loved his voice. “They start to get blurry. No point in planting your roots, ’cause you're gone in a hurry. My dad keeps two suitcases packed in the den, so it's only a matter of when…”  
Logan tried to reach out, to tell him that they should share numbers so that they could stay in contact. Yet he found unable to speak, only listening to this marvelous boy sing. Shit, Logan didn’t want to catch feelings.

Virgil seemed unaware of the effects he was having on Logan. “I don't learn the names, don’t bother with faces. All I can trust is this concrete oasis. Seems every time I'm about to despair there's a 7-11 right there.” He spun around looking at the shop as if it was some kind of god. “Each store is the same from Las Vegas to Boston, linoleum aisles that I love to get lost in. I pray at my altar of slush, yeah I live for that sweet frozen rush”  
Virgil paused for a second to drink, before continuing.

“Freeze your brain, suck on that straw, get lost in the pain. Happiness comes when everything numbs, who needs cocaine? Freeze your brain. Freeze your brain…”  
“Care for a hit?” Virgil said, offering his own slushie.  
Logan tried it, and was horrified by the mix of flavours Virgil had offered him. He’d stick with strawberry.  
“Does your mother know you eat all this… shit?” He asked, realizing he was finally able of speaking.

Virgil laughed shortly. “Not anymore!” And Logan knew he fucked up. “When mom was alive we lived halfway normal, but now it's just me and my dad; we're less formal. I learned to cook pasta, I learned to pay rent. Learned the world doesn’t owe you a cent.”  
He felt Virgil’s hands on his shoulders before hearing him sing to his ear softly. “You’re planning your future, got something to offer, you'll go to some college and marry a lawyer.” He let go of him, spinning him around. “But the sky's gonna hurt when it falls. So you better start building some walls.”

“Freeze your brain, swim in the ice, get lost in the pain. Shut your eyes tight, till you vanish from sight. Let nothing remain.” Virgil sang, starting to slightly shake.  
The slushie fell to the ground as Virgil’s hands went into his hair, trying to calm down. “Freeze your brain, shatter your skull, fight pain with more pain. Forget who you are unburden your load forget in six weeks you'll be back on the road.” His tears ran free and Logan felt the urge to dry them out, to tell him everything would be ok.  
“When the voice in your head says you're better off dead don't open a vein.” His knees gave out and he fell to the ground, shaking and crying.

Logan wrapped Virgil in a tight hug, not knowing exactly what to do to comfort him. “Just freeze your brain…” He felt Virgil’s arms surround him softly as he kept singing. “Freeze your brain…”  
Virgil pushed Logan lightly away. “Go on and freeze your brain” He stood up, drying his tears.  
“Try it” He finished, offering a hand to Logan.

Logan reached out to take Virgil’s hand, mesmerized by this boy.  
And then the bell rang, destroying the moment.

Logan was startled, jumping back. He looked at Virgil, who had dried his tears with the back of his hand. “I should get to class.” Logan said, avoiding Virgil’s gaze.  
“Yeah, me too. See you around, Lo” Virgil agreed, patting Logan on the shoulder before leaving.  
Logan was left alone for a few moments in the seven eleven. He rose to his feet and exited the store. He grabbed Virgil’s drink when he left, throwing it at the trash.

“Patton” Logan called his friend, as they walked to class.  
Patton looked at him and beamed. “Hey, Logan. Where did you go? Remus told me to tell you that rehearsals are cancelled until they find another Carlotta. And another members have quitted, so maybe they cancel the show completely.”

“Oh. What a shame.” Logan said, opening the door for Patton. “Anyways… I think I like someone.”  
Logan regretted his words, as Patton started bombarding him with questions during the entirety of math class.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't wait until we start killing off characters and getting angsty.  
> I'm looking forward to Lifeboat especially...  
> Though, knowing myself, it won't be til next year or something.
> 
> Hope you liked it.


	5. (No) Big Fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan spends a whole afternoon in a party, regretting his life and friend choices.
> 
> And the author has given up trying to follow Heather's plot line. She shall do what she pleases now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For everyone who had the patience to wait for this, congratulations, I've finally dragged myself to finish the goddamn chapter.  
> Enjoy!

“No, no, no, you're doing it wrong!” Remus said, interrupting Logan's conversation with Deceit. He walked to the end of the stage, where Roman and Buquet's actor, Charlie, were standing. Logan and Deceit exchanged similar 'what's going on?' gazes and followed suit.

Roman adjusted Charlie's disguise, extracting the rope he was using. “Well, you try! I can't adjust this damn thing and I don't want to actually kill Charlie.” He gestured towards Charlie, who was having second thoughts about his role.

“Give me that” He took the rope from his brother's hands. “Logan come here, you're the one doing this in the play anyways.” He opened Charlie's shirt wider, making the poor boy blush.

Logan approached, watching how Remus seemed unaware of Charlie's discomfort. He tied the rope in a complicated manner, as Logan watched.

“Your turn now” He tossed the rope to Logan, stepping back to let him try.

Logan repeated Remus's actions until Charlie stoped him. “Are you ok?” Logan asked, giving him space.

“I don't like this. I think I'm quitting.” Charlie said, taking the rope off him and handing it to Logan. He left, leaving the others alone.

The three brothers and Logan were the only ones left at the auditorium. They stood there in silence for a few moments.

“That's the third one this week who leaves.” Deceit pointed out. “Maybe we should cancel the play.”

“What?! No!!” Roman exclaimed, failing in his attempts of not rising his voice. “I've been waiting since forever to play the phantom of the opera! Do you know how hard was to convince Mr. Sanders?”

“We could do a smaller play” Logan offered, leaving the rope with the rest of the props. “The year has only started.”

Remus giggled. “It's only started and one student's dead. Maybe we should do Beetlejuice.”

“I don't think the faculty would appreciate that morbid humor.” Deceit said. “And Beetlejuice is not a small play”

“Smaller than Erik's bullshit” Remus muttered.

Roman punched him lightly. “Erik is a perfect character, so shut up.”

“A perfect character that was a horrible person.” Logan said.

“And who threw tantrums. Oh, the chandelier, that's the best scene” Remus said, followed by sounds mimicking the fall of the chandelier and some extra explosions.

“We don't have the resources to bring down the chandelier.” Roman said. “We're on a budget.”

Deceit scoffed. “The theatre club is on a budget, yet the faculty can afford a full on memoriam of Heather with free food and music included.”

“And they give the football team the triple than what they give to us.” Remus grumbled. “Fuck the faculty.”

“The faculty was the one who provided the dresses and everything. I wouldn't complain so much.” Logan said. “Talking about dresses, we should get changed before Mr. Sanders finds us. I think classes start soon.”

Roman complained loudly. “I've got maths. God, I hate that teacher. Anyways, Logan, come to our home and we'll drive you to Sweeney's party, ok?”

“Sure” Logan said, watching as Remus struggled to get out his costume.

“I can't believe Sweeney's still having a party after Heather died. Seems disrespectful to me” Deceit commented, helping Remus out of his tux.

Remus was able to take off his jacket, almost knocking Deceit to the ground in the process. “And talking shit bout her ain't disrespectful?”

“It's not talking shit if it's the truth.” Deceit said, folding the jacket.

Logan was going to reply with a “yes, it its”, but the bell rang. He bid his goodbyes and ran to class, where Patton was waiting for him.

Logan looked once more at the address on his phone screen. A message popped in his screen.

Virgilicious: hey, wanna hang out?

Logan smiled, and replied.

Logan: I can't today. I've got a party with Roman and company. Maybe tomorrow?

He waited for a few seconds, until he got the reply.

Virgilicious: nah

Virgilicious: 'm bussy

Virgilicious: see ya

Logan put his phone in his pocket, feeling somehow disappointed. He walked down the street until he found the house he was looking for. A big one that seemed quite expensive. Someone had painted the garden gnomes so that they looked like either goblins or dragons. Or something Logan did not comprehend that was very red.

He rang the bell, fixing his shirt quickly. A woman in her late thirties opened.

“Greetings.” Logan said, feeling more nervous than he should. “I'm Logan Berry. Deceit's friend. And the others too, but they're louder and I preffer Deceit.” He stopped himself before he rambled even more.

“Alright kiddo” The woman said amused. “Wait a second, my wife is still instructing the boys on what to do and what not to do. Would you like to come in til then?”

The woman–Patricia, Logan learned.– led him to the kitchen where he offered a cookie. They chatted for a while, until minutes later, when the three brothers entered too.

“Bye mom! Mamma already gave us the ted talk, no need for more” Roman said, pecking her cheek as she ruffled his hair.

“Have fun!” Patricia said, doing the same to Remus. “Don't get drunk.” She only patted Deceit lightly. She waved at them as they exited the house.

After a few minutes walking, Logan spoke.

“How did you manage to convince your mothers after Remus's detention?” He asked, watching Remus stop at the sidewalk to take a snail.

“Patricia is easily convinced.” Deceit explained. “Veronica allowed it, until Heather got killed. She started getting paranoid about it.”

Roman took the snail from Remus's hands, leaving it in the grass. “Mamma thinks we're gonna get drunk. Mom just wants us to be careful”

“We've got more chances of getting murdered than to die like as Heather” Remus said, taking the snail once more.

Logan looked at him and raised an eyebrow. “Falsehood. In our age rank drunk accidents are more likely than homicide. Especially since we are male.”

Deceit took the snail from Remus again leaving it on a tree. The snail moved high enough so Remus couldn't take him. “Unless Heather's wasn't an accident but a murder.”

“Are you still implying there's a murderer on the loose? You've read too many crime novels.” Roman said, pulling Remus away from the tree his twin was attempting to climb.

“And you've seen too many Disney movies, yet we don't complain” Deceit replied.

“Falsehood. You two are constantly complaining about it.” Logan said.

“Well, what can I do? He never stops singing!” Remus complained, finally walking normal like a human being. He looked at the ground, searching for another snail or better yet, a slug.

“You never stop bringing bugs to our room, so suck it up” Roman said.

Logan and Deceit ignored them both, walking a bit faster as the twins argued and argued and argued. They were not amused. Not at all. ~~They were~~.

At the exact moment they entered Sweeney’s house, Logan knew this had been a very bad idea. The place stank as alcohol and smoke. Logan didn’t want to know who was smoking.

Logan stared at the sea of teenagers in front of him, searching for Patton. Remus pushed him aside, running into the pool. Deceit soon followed, trying to stop him from jumping with all his clothes on.

Logan headed inside, and in the way he lost hold of Roman. He heard students drunkly singing.

“The folks are gone, it’s time for big fun! Big fun!”

“We’re up till dawn, having some big fun! Big fun!”

“When mom and dad forget to lock the liquor cabinet”

“It’s big fun! Big fun!”

Logan covered his ears and navigated the crowd. There were drunk students making out in every content, drinking even more, and just… being irresponsible.

Someone spilled a drink on Logan, and he groaned and made his way to the back of the house. He heard someone laugh, and finally recognized Roman, along Emile and Remy. All three of them clearly drunk. He hurried to their side, catching a glimpse of their conversation.

“Ok, ok, ok. So, it's salt, and then lime, and then shot?” Roman said, holding a red cup which Logan quickly took away.

Remy shook his head, attention full on Roman. “No, it's salt, and then—”

“You shouldn’t be doing this!” Logan snapped, taking his drink too.

Emile laughed “Really? 'Cause I feel great”

Logan groaned, taking his cup along the others. He started regretting his choices.

He noticed Deceit and Remus not too far away, holding something that didn’t seem entirely legal. He sighted and went to get them, pulling the others with him.

A girl crossed his path, offering him a number scribbled in a paper. “Logan, you are looking good tonight!”

Logan blushed, mumbling an excuse and moving to get the other two idiots.

“Whoa. A hot girl smiled at you without a trace of mockery!” Emile said, while attaching to Logan’s arm. Logan sighted, ignoring Roman’s laughs.

“Everyone’s high as a kite. Ain’t nobody home tonight!” Remy sang, to which Logan rolled his eyes.

He finally reached Remus and Dee, pushing drunk students to do so.

“Stoned. Zoned. You should quit…” Logan didn’t bother to ask himself why he was singing. “Shit, is that weed?” He took it from Remus’s hands. “What’s this shit?”

Remus let out an offended gasp and reached for his drugs. “Fill that joint and roll it tight. Ain't nobody home tonight!”

Logan had to throw it to the trash can, and shut it closed before Remus tried to retrieve it from the bin.

He looked around him, trying to locate all his friends. Remus was trying to drunkly open the trash can. Roman was trying to flirt with a (drunk) guy. Emile and Remy were avoiding his football teammates. Wait. Where was Dee?

Logan looked around quickly. It had been two minutes, how can you lose someone under two minutes???

He found Dee. On top of a table. With a bottle of who knows what singing on top his lungs.

“Dreams are coming true when people laugh but not at you!” He sang, jumping to greet Logan. “I’m not alone! I'm not afraid! I feel like Bono at LiveAid!” He spun around, crashing into the wall for support. Logan took advantage of this and took the near empty bottle from him.

He pulled Dee and went to the others. “You.” He said letting Dee go. “Are going to stay here. No more alcohol, no drugs.” He said, earning annoying grunts from everyone. “No… weird shit.”He added, after seeing the look in Remus eyes. Remus pouted. “Roman, stop flirting with straight guys.” He said once he saw him checking some dude’s ass.

Roman let go Offended Princey Noises™ “But they’re so hot, Logan! Can’t you see them?”

Dee giggled, leaning into Emile. Remus was going to add a gross comment on a guy’s ass, but thankfully for us, someone interrupted.

“Alright, people, listen up! What is Westerberg gonna do to the Razorbacks at Sunday's game?” Kurt screamed, holding a horrendous pig piñata.

Remy groaned, rolling his eyes under his sunglasses. Emile looked away, as if saying ‘I’m not with them’

Ram grabbed the other end of the pig. “Gonna make 'em go whee! Whee! Whee! Whee!” He said, smashing the pig with their hips.

“Way to show maturity!” Remy shouted, approaching them.

Ram and Kurt exchanged looks and smirked. Ram took the pig, throwing it at Remy.

“Quit it jackass, get off of me!” Remy said, pushing the pig to the ground.

“Yo! Ram! Emergency!” Logan chimed in from behind. “I just saw some freshmen sneaking over the pool fence!”

Ram seemed to instantly forget about Remy. “I hate freshmen! Where are you little pricks? I'm coming for you!” He ran outside, leaving Remy alone.

Logan looked at Remy, ignoring the people screaming. “Hey, are you okay?”

“I didn't need your help” Remy snapped, giving Logan the middle finger.

Emile snickered, slumping on Logan’s arm. “Aw, thanks, Remy, but Logan doesn't really have to vomit right now”

Logan facepalmed, pulling Remy and Emile back with the others. “Don’t move. I need to find Patton.” He said, before noticing Remus searching through the trash. “Remus, stop, for fuck’s sake, just stop!” He pulled him from the trash.

Roman rolled his eyes, looking away. His eyes landed on the door, which just happened to be opening. Patton entered, holding a bottle of something. He nudged Dee, who was dozing off next to him.

“Wah, what?” He said, rubbing his eyes. Roman gestured to Patton.

“Patton Dunnstock, in the flesh” He sang, causing Dee to giggle.

Remus approached from behind them. “Here comes the Logan’s boyfriend. We should—”

“Hold up, Remus” Roman cut him off, seeing Logan leave them.

“Sorry, Roman” Remus grumbled, annoyed.

Deceit snickered once more, pointing at Logan. “Look who's with him — Oh, my God!”

Remus laughed too. “The lovebirds are getting together. What a shame Logan had no drinks.” He said. “Things would get so juicy.”

“Please don’t use the word juicy in that meaning” Roman asked.

“Too late!” Remus yelled. “Already done”

Roman groaned, and Dee just limited himself to giggling again.

“I can't believe you actually came” Logan greeted Patton, who looked lost. “This is a disaster, I need to stop everyone from getting even drunker.”

Patton laughed. “It’s exciting, right? Oh, I want to say hello to the others. I brought sparkling cider!” He started walking to the others.

“Patton, wait!” Logan called as he followed Patton. “I’m not joking, everyone’s drunk. Remy is getting violent and Dee won’t do anything but laugh.”

Patton looked at the others. Remus and Roman were arguing about when the word juicy could be accepted and Deceit was laughing at them. Emile was the only one stopping Remy from murdering Ram and Kurt.

“Ok, you’re right.” He said. “Let’s just leave”

Logan relaxed. “Thank you, I’d be dead without you”

Patton and Logan joined the others. Patton smiled to greet them, before Remus jumped to take the bottle of cider from him. He took a drink and spitted it on Logan. “This is shit.” He declared, tossing it to Deceit, who gladly drank it.

Logan gritted his teeth. “That’s it.” He said. “You’re going home. I can’t stand your irresponsible asses for more than two seconds.” He took a bottle of who knows what from Roman and drank sip. “I’m done.” He pulled his phone from his pocket. “I’m calling your mothers.”

“Whoah, whoah, Logan, buddy, aren’t you being a little dramatic?” Roman said, holding Logan’s hand so he didn’t do anything.

“Dramatic? You uncultured swine, look at yourselves!” Logan yelled pulling his hand away. He took another sip. It tasted good.

Patton moved between them. “Logan, please calm down.” He tried to grab the bottle. “Don’t get drunk too.”

“Don’t.” Logan snapped, moving away. “You two” He pointed at Emile and Remy. “Are clearly drunk, hate your teammates and have no reason to be in the football team yet you are. Along with those assholes you claim to hate so much!” He turned to Remus and Roman. “You two, clearly drunk too. You won’t come down the stage for more than two minutes to realize how wrong you are. You have the ego to believe to be the best of the school when everyone sees you as the marginalized club that will probably be shut down soon.” He turned to Deceit. “And you.” Deceit giggled. “You’re… stoned, aren’t you?”

Deceit shrugged. “Ram gave me a red cup”

“Fuck you.” Logan started to phone Veronica, thanking her hindsight of giving him her number. “I’m calling your mother.” He drank a bit more, he couldn’t bring himself to care at this point.

“Hey! Stop!” Roman yelled at him. “First you insult us and now you snitch on us?! Who do you think you are??”

“Obviously, the only logical person present.” Logan snapped.

Remus tried to grab Logan’s phone. “Stop! Don’t do that!”

“Or what?” Logan said, pushing the call button. He smiled and drank.

“Or tomorrow you’ll be dead once you enter school, you pathetic excuse of phantom” Roman said pulling Logan to his level.

Everyone around went quiet suddenly, several students watching amused. Deceit broke the silence giggling. He stumbled to Logan.

“After all, I’ll always play the villain. I mean, look at my face.” He slurred swaying where he stood.

Patton tried to approach him. “Don’t say that, Dee.”

“You’re drunk, just, stop” Logan said.

Deceit giggled. “I’m not” Then, he proceeded to double down and vomit on Logan’s shoes.

Logan groaned, gritting his teeth. “We’re leaving. Now.” Without waiting for response he went outside, waiting for Veronica to answer the call.

The time between the call and Veronica’s arriving was blurred by Logan’s anger and the drink he’d snatched from Roman. Eventually, Patton lured the brothers, Remy and Emile outside.

When Veronica arrived, he started giving the twins the scolding of their lives. Patricia approached Logan to thank him. Patton took Emile and Remy home with Remy’s car, while the other three went home.

Logan threw the empty bottle to the nearest trash can and started walking home. He’d deal with his problems later.

He’d deal with Roman later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed, comment if you liked, yadi yadi yada.
> 
> I'll try to continue soon, but I make no promises.


	6. Dead girl (boy?) walking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drunk Logan makes bad choices and Roman should really check what he's drinking before he drinks it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now, when I say I'm making Virgil an asshole, I mean he's a psychopath who you'll probably hate once this is done.
> 
> Also, as I've given up on following the Heather's original plot, I am now changing everything as I fucking please. Please enjoy!

“The demon king of high school has decreed it. He says Monday 8am I will be deleted.” Logan said, walking on the light street’s side. “They’ll hunt me down in study hall, stuff and mount me on the wall. 30 hours to live, how shall I spend it?”

He wasn’t aware of what time it was, but the moon sure looked pretty tonight. “I don't have to stay and die like cattle, I could change my name and ride up to Seattle.”

“But I don't own a motorbike.” Logan said, looking at the houses around him, and noticing something. “Wait, here's an option that I like: Spend do these 30 hours getting freaky”

He spotted a small house with the lights on. And there, in the window, he saw Virgil.

Logan smiled, approaching the fence. He had never climbed a fence before, but he didn’t really care right now. “I need it hard, I'm the dead boy walking.” He fell to the grass, losing his breath for a moment. “I’m in your yard, I'm the dead boy walking”

He stood up, brushing the dirt from his clothes. “Before they punch my clock, I'm snapping off your window lock. Got no time to knock, I'm your dead boy walking.”

He somehow managed to climb to Virgil’s window and snap it open.

Virgil jumped as he saw him enter, throwing his phone away. “Logan! What are you doing in my room?”

Logan giggled, approaching him in the bed. “Shhhhh”

“Sorry but I really had to wake you, see I've decided that I must ride you till I break you” Virgil blushed and muttered out an ‘are you drunk?’

“Cause Roman says I gotts to go. You're my last meal on death row, so shut your mouth and loose them tidy whiteys” Logan started taking off his jacket, to which Virgil took his hands to stop him. Logan responded by pinning him to the bed. “Come on, tonight I'm yours, I'm your dead boy walking”

Virgil pushed him off and stood from the bed. Logan followed. “Get on all fours. Kiss this dead boy walking”

“You’re drunk, I’m not doing this while you’re drunk” Virgil said.

Logan pouted. “Why not?”

Virgil gestured vaguely. “It’s… wrong! And we’re not even dating!”

“Oh…” Logan said. He plummeted in the bed. “Are cuddles ok?”

“I… guess?” Virgil said. “Why did you come here?”

“Roman wants me dead and I don’t want to die virgin.” Logan said, turning on the bed to look at Virgil, who sat next to him.

Virgil laughed. “You’re going to hate yourself in the morning when I tell you about it.” He pushed Logan to one side of the bed. “Move, I need space if you want to cuddle.”

As Logan fell asleep, Virgil ran his fingers through his hair, wondering how to get away with murder.

When Logan woke up, hearing the birds chip through the window. He rubbed his eyes, and sat up. An arm grabbed him by the hip and pulled him back to the bed. Logan yelped and looked over his shoulder. Virgil buried his face on Logan’s shoulder. “Too early. Cuddle time.”

“What happened last night?” Logan asked, hesitant to snuggle back.

“You broke into my room wanting to fuck.” Virgil mumbled. “We ended up cuddling while you ranted to sleep about something sciency”

“Oh.” Logan said, blushing. “I was… drunk”

“Yep” Virgil said, sitting up and running a hand through his hand. “So… you have a crush on me?”

Logan blushed and mumbled something impossible to understand. He sat up too, looking away. Virgil laughed, getting up from the bed. He checked the alarm clock. “It’s nine a.m., your parents will be worried.”

Logan groaned, searching for his shoes. They were under Virgil’s desk. How did they even get there, no one knows. “They think I’m spending the night at Deceit’s or Patton’s. Speaking of Sander, I should probably apologise to Roman.”

“Apologise?” Virgil said. “By what you told me yesterday, it seems as if it should be the other way around.”

Logan sighted. “Maybe. I don’t know, I just think we should deescalate the argument, and dialogue is the best way of doing so.”

Virgil snickered. “There’s the Logan I know.” He pulled his jacket on, and took his shoes from the closet. “Never get drunk again, it doesn’t suit you.”

“Being drunk is not a suit…” Logan muttered, to which Virgil only laughed.

Roman opened the door, dressed in sweatpants and a dressing gown. He leaned in the doorway, looking at Logan and his companion.

He rubbed his eyes, tired. “What do you want?” He asked.

“May I come in?” Said Logan.

“Yeah, sure” Roman said, opening the door for them. He looked at Virgil confused. “Who are you?”

“He’s Virgil, my… I’m not entirely sure what our relationship is.” Logan introduced. “Virgil, this is Roman Sander, from the theatre club.”

Roman arched an eyebrow at Virgil, who just fidgeted with his clothing. He looked at Logan again, then at Virgil. “You better date him before I do, emo boy”

Having said that, he left the two blushing messes and headed to his room. “Come along, I’ve got a headache that’s been killing me, I refuse to stand up for more than two seconds.”

Logan groaned. “You’ve been standing up for several minutes.” He followed to Roman’s room, Virgil behind him.

Roman’s room was bigger than Logan expected. And tidier. It was full of bookshelves and posters, with a desk flooded with papers and art supplies. Roman threw himself to the bed, which was also full of cushions and plushes.

Logan pulled Roman’s chair and sat there, seeing as Roman didn’t show any signs of sitting normally. Virgil stood awkwardly at the door.

Roman groaned, rubbing his temples. “Hey, emo boy” He called out. “Would you be a darling and bring me an aspirin from the kitchen?”

Virgil muttered something and left the room, to look for the kitchen.

Logan and Roman stood in silence for a few moments. Finally, Logan spoke. “Where are your brothers? And your mothers?”

“I dunno, out there doing stuff. Mom’s at work.” Roman said. He crawled to a sitting position. “Why are you here?”

“To apologise.” Logan said. “Also, how’s Dee? He seemed quite…”

“High?” Roman proposed.

Logan laughed, shaking his head. “Sick. I don’t think he should be drinking anytime soon.”

“Oh, don’t worry, mamma has forbidden for going to parties ever again.” Roman said. “Anyways, I really should apologise too. I was drunk as fuck, dude, I didn’t mean what I said”

Logan smiled. “It’s alright.”

Meanwhile, Virgil found the kitchen. In the table, there was a red mug with water and a pack of aspirins. Virgil smiled, knowing what to do.

He grabbed the mug and threw the water down the sink. He opened the drawers under the sink, and looked around until he found the bleach. He filled the mug and left it where he found it, placing the bleach next to the table, half hidden under it. He closed the drawers and dried the sink.

He grabbed the aspirin, hurrying to Roman’s bedroom again.

“Sorry for taking so long, I just… you know.” He said, fidgeting with his hoodie. “I couldn’t find the kitchen.”

Roman and Logan seemed to have been enjoying a nice conversation. Now, this wouldn’t do for Virgil.

“Oh, it’s ok.” Roman said, taking the pill. “Eh… I need water to take this” He said, awkwardly holding the pill. “Mom told me she left me water next to the pills, I’m sure you’ve seen it.”

“Oh.” Virgil said. “Oh! Right, sorry, god I’m such a mess.” He fidgeted even more, looking away.

Logan stood up, walking to Virgil. He placed a hand on his shoulder. “It’s ok, I’ll get it. You should sit down and relax a bit”

Virgil nodded, and sat down where Logan had been. His leg bounced, and he avoided eye contact with Roman. Roman, on the other hand, looked at him sceptic.

“Do you need anything?” Roman asked.

“I’m fine” Virgil snapped. He sighted, evening his breaths. “Sorry. I’m just… I don’t like new places.”

Roman shrugged. “It’s ok. It’s not the worst thing someone’s ever said to me.” Roman commented, playing with the pill on his hands. “So… you like Logan?”

Virgil scoffed when he realised what Roman was doing. “He went to my house last night, I think it’s the other way around”

“He went to your house?” Roman asked. “To do what?”

“To fuck” Virgil deadpanned.

Roman laughed. He stopped when Virgil didn’t laugh. “You’re serious?” Virgil nodded. “Oh. Congratulations, I guess. You got the hot one”

Virgil laughed, gritting his teeth. He nodded again, agreeing with Roman.

Logan hurried to the kitchen. He saw a red mug on the table. That must be the water Roman mentioned. He quickly grabbed it and went back to Roman’s bedroom.

Virgil was sitting on Logan’s place and Roman was lying against cushions, a plushie between his hands.

He offered the mug to Roman. “Here you go”

Roman smiled. “Thanks, Lo. You’re the best.” He took the pill and started drinking. His smile disappeared after he swallowed. He dropped the mug, coughing. He wheezed, his hands gripping his throat. He gasped, looking at Logan once more before he collapsed on the bed.

Logan rushed to his side. “Roman? Roman, what’s…?” He looked at the mug, noticing the bleach. “Oh, fuck.”

Logan turned to Virgil, who had stood up to approach them. He pulled his phone and threw it at Virgil’s hands. “Call nine one one, NOW!”

He ran into the kitchen.

Virgil smirked, unlocking the phone. “You should probably check what ‘Lo’ gives you, Roman” He said. He almost laughed when Roman grunted, trying to sit up and failing.

“ _911, what’s your emergency?_ ” The phone answered.

Virgil switched to his anxious voice. “I-I need help! I’m not sure what happened, but my friend, he’s, he’s, I dunno! He drank something, and now he’s choking!” 

He stopped listening to the voice, that mentioned something about an ambulance. He looked to Roman, who was still wheezing and trying to breathe.

He placed the phone aside for a second. “Stop trying. You’re basically dead now.” Roman could only wheeze as a response.

Logan entered the room, and Virgil went back to the phone, walking in circles and fidgeting with his hoodie. 

Logan ran to Roman’s side, holding a bottle of milk. He manhandled Roman into a sitting position.

“Roman. Listen. I need you to stay with me, can you do that?” He took the milk bottle again and opened it. He held it to his lips. “I need you to drink this, it’ll help you, I promise”

Roman did as he said, gripping Logan’s arm as if his life depended on it.

“Great. Just hold on.” Logan said, lying him down again. “I need you to stay with me, ok? You’ll be alright, the ambulance is on its way.”

Logan held Roman, whispering to him enough so he stayed conscious. Roman latched onto him, as he wheezed in his attempts of breathing normally.

Only when the ambulance came, and the paramedics entered, did Logan let go of his friend.

Logan was standing on the house’s stairs, staring blankly at the ambulance. He flinched when he noticed someone’s hand on his shoulder.

“Sorry” Virgil apologised sheepishly. “I, erm… Found this. On Roman’s bed, next to his pillow.” He held out a piece of paper, folded several times. “I think… I think it’s a suicide note.”

Logan stared at it for a few moments, before taking it. “I should give this to the authorities.” He blankly said. He shivered, holding back tears.

Logan handed the note to the policemen present. If he had only read it, he would’ve noticed a detail.

It wasn’t Roman’s handwriting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this, and please, do comment if you liked it. It boosts my self esteem.
> 
> Also, Roman isn't dead (yet) for the following reasons:
> 
> 1\. He didn't drink as much as Heather Chandler did. Heather Chandler drinks the whole thing without flinching, Roman drinks like... half of it.  
> 2\. Milk. I got this tip from my biology teacher.  
> 3\. They call an ambulance instead of just giving up on the boy.  
> 4\. He's my favourite, I ain't killing him yet.


	7. Me inside of me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman thought being half dead would be more interesting than this. Like, meeting hot ethereal beings that would give him advice on what to do if he died.  
> But now he was stuck here, and the only person that could see him was the nerd. Great.  
> Well, at least he could bother someone...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back from the dead. I'll leave this here and go back to being dead.
> 
> Also, important things to keep in mind:  
> -I have no idea how America's schools system work  
> -I had a real hard time making the song into narrative because I kept getting distracted and just decided to give up on that  
> -Linear concept of time that makes sense? Who's she? Never heard of her...
> 
> Enjoy!

“So…” Said one of the officers, handing her partner some coffee. “Attempted murder? The kid is on a comma.”

Her partner took the coffee and passed her a photocopied note. “Nah, look at this. A suicide note.”

Roman looked over the coffee to read the note. That wasn’t his handwriting. He did not write this.

“‘Dear world… Believe it or not, I knew about fear; I knew the way loneliness stung. I hid behind smiles and crazy hot clothes; I learned to kiss boys with my tongue.’” The officer read.

Roman grimaced. He did know how to kiss boys, but that sounded nothing like him. How stupid could people be to believe the police would buy this?

“‘But oh, the world, it held me down; It weighed like a concrete prom queen crown.’” The other officer said, as if she had memorized this by memory already.

“No one thinks a pretty girl has feelings. No one gets her insecurity. I am more than shoulder pads and makeup. No one sees the me inside of me…”

“Jesus, you're making it sound like Air Supply!” Roman complained, fully aware no one would hear it.

“Remus we need to go.” Deceit said, trying to pull Remus from the chair he was sitting on. “Roman is stable, we can’t stay here. You need to go home and get some sleep.”

Remus ignored him, eyes fixed on Roman.

Deceit sighted and sat next to him.

Five more minutes wouldn’t hurt, right?

“Whoa! Was it murder attempt?” Asked some guy, probably another police officer on break, approaching the couple who was reading the note.

“No, look.” They gave him the note too. “Here’s the suicide note.”

Roman was starting to get bored with all this useless police officers. “That’s not mine, you bunch of idiots. I’m not a girl.”

“‘They couldn't see past my rockstar mystique, they wouldn't dare look in my eyes. But just underneath was a terrified girl who clings to her pillow and cries! My looks were just like prison bars; They've left me a myriad of scars.’”

“‘Myriad’, Nice. Whoever wrote it has a good sense of poetry. Something’s something” Roman said.

"No one thinks a pretty girl has substance. That's the curse of popularity."

"I am more than just a source of handjobs.”

Roman snickered. “That sounds like something Remus would say, not me.”

"No one sees the me inside of me.”

Roman rolled his eyes. He decided he’d rather go find his brothers than watch this.

“Hey. Are you feeling any better?” Virgil asked, placing the phone on his shoulder as he struggled to open the old box on his attic.

“ _Not really._ ” Came Logan’s tired voice from the other end. “ _I got some sleep, though._ ”

“You need to stop blaming yourself.” Virgil said.

“ _I know, I know…_ ” Logan said, sounding not convinced.

“Even if they blame you,” Virgil started, looking at the open box with satisfaction, “you know I’ll still be there for you.”

“ _Yeah, thanks._ ” Virgil could practically hear Logan’s smile. “ _I love you._ ”

“I love you too.”

He hanged up and looked at his old things. Including his old medication he had already stopped taking a while ago.

This should be fun…

“Roman Sander is not your everyday suicide.”

“I’m not dead yet, bitch. I might be a ghost, but fuck you.” Roman said, watching over everyone. His brothers should finish classes soon and he was bored. Being in a coma made everything dull.

“You should cancel classes.”

“No way, Coach. I send the kids home before lunch and the switchboard'll light up like a Christmas tree.”

“Our children are dying!” The scream made Roman wince. A bit too overdramatic for his like. And he was dramatic… “I suggest we get everyone into the cafeteria and just talk and feel, together.”

“Thank you, Ms. Fleming. Call me when the shuttle lands.”

“I’m telling you, we all misjudged Roman Sander. This is the loveliest suicide note I've ever read.”

“How many suicide notes have you read?” Roman said, at the same time his theatre teacher muttered it under his breath.

“Ooh, great minds think alike!” Roman beamed, looking at Mr Sanders. He then realised he couldn’t hear him. “Oh, right, no one can hear me. Being on the brink of death is annoying.”

"Box up my clothing for Goodwill

And give the poor my Nordick Track

Donate my car to crippled kids  
Or to those ghetto moms on crack

Give them my hats and my CDs  
My pumps and my flats, my three TVs!"

“I don’t have half of the shit you mentioned, ya know? Who needs three TVs?”

“Hey, Remus,” Logan said, approaching his friend. “I came to–”

“Shut it.” Remus snapped. “I don’t want to hear it. Now fuck off, don’t you have homework to do?”

Logan had no chance of speaking as Remus promptly walked away. Deceit lingered behind.

“He needs some time.” He said, his eyes focusing on the ground. “We all do.”

He left, leaving Logan worse than he had started.

"No one thinks a pretty girl has feelings;

But I weep for all I failed to be

Maybe I can help the world by leaving;  
Maybe that the me inside of me."

Remy approached Deceit at lunch. “Hey gurl, how you keeping up?”

“Stop that.” Deceit said, not looking up from his food.

“Stop what?” Remy asked, sitting in front of him.

“Stop pretending everything’s alright.” Deceit said, setting down his fork and looking at him. “It’s not, ok? And I don’t need to be treated like glass for it.”

“Dee…” Remy started. “Why don’t you come with Emile, the newbies and I? We can eat toget–”

Deceit stood up from his seat. “I’m going to see if Remus is ok. He’s been in the toilet for a while now.”

Remy sighted. Roman wished he could pat his friend’s back. “At least you tried…”

But of course, Remy didn’t hear him, as he went back to the other table.

“Aw, hell. Long weekend for everybody!”

There was a chorus of cheers coming from the students.

Then Ms. Fleming spoke, killing their joy.

“Not so fast, kids. They're refueling the buses, which gives us a solid half-hour of healing Now I have mimeographed copies of the suicide note so you can feel Roman’s anguish. I'll pass the suicide note around so you can feel Roman’s anguish”

“Wait, don’t give that to his brothers, that’s not–” The theatre teacher was promptly ignored as Ms Fleming started handing out the notes.

“Why does no one listen to the only cool teacher?” Roman wondered, looking over Deceit’s shoulder. He didn’t even have to float to do that. Deceit was short.

“I never knew about her pain” A girl said. Roman winced at the female pronouns.

“Go on!” Miss Fleming encouraged.

“Her life had hit a rocky patch.” Another guy said. Roman watched Remus dump the letter on the trash can and exit the school building.

“Feel!”

“Deep down she wasn't cruel or vain” Some girl said. Roman let go of some offended noises.

“Excuse me, but I never acted cruel, you asshole. And I’m a boy, stop misgendering me!” He said, deeply insulted.

“Heal!”

“She didn't mean to be such a snatch!”

“Deceit, you're very quiet. What's on your mind?” Ms. Fleming said, turning to Deceit, who was clutching the paper with both hands. It looked as if he was going to rip it at any moment.

Roman felt like slapping a teacher was a good option at the moment. Too bad he was incorporeal. “Oh, you did not just do that, bitch.”

“You’re all acting like he was dead already. What do you think is on my mind?” Deceit hissed, before turning away from the crowd before they saw him vulnerable.

There was silence for a few moments, before Ms. Fleming broke it again, a forced smile on her face.

“Ok, eh… Patton?” She turned to the other student.

Patton hesitated, looking around at the crowd that stared at him. “Uh, maybe Roman realized that in order to be happy he had to give up his power. And that the only way to do that was... death”

Roman resisted the impulse of facepalming. “Patton, I love you, but that’s bullshit.”

“My God, look what we've done. We’re breaking through! Roman would be so proud of you!” Ms. Fleming said, looking genuinely happy.

“I’m not proud, I fucking hate your guts.” Roman muttered.

“No one thinks a pretty girl can touch you…”

“Roman touching me…” Roman cringed at that.

“But she's made us better than we were”

“Roman’s dead, but she will live inside me, and I'll be the me inside of her…”

Roman floated over the whole student crowd. “Holy crap! I’m not dead yet!”

“Roman cried, our sins fell on her shoulders!”

“Jesus Christ!”

“Roman died, so we could all be free!”

“You’re all a bunch of assholes!” He shouted.

“Roman’s gone, but she will live forever!”

“She’s the dove that sings outside my window!”

“She’s the twin from whom I'm separated!”

“…Do I even have to mention Remus?”

“She’s the horse I never got for Christmas!”

“Roman sees the me inside of me!”

“No, I don’t. Fuck off.”

“Roman is the me inside of me!”

“Inside of... me!”

“It’s official. I hate this town” Roman said, lowering next to Logan.

“Me too…” Logan muttered under his breath, trying to ignore the fact that he was seeing ghosts.

“Christine you must have been dreaming, things like these can’t come true. Christine you’re speaking in riddles, and it’s not like yo–”

“Could you please, _please,_ stop singing the Phantom of the Opera?” Logan pleaded, looking up from his homework to where Roman was floating above his bed. Ever since Roman had figured out Logan could see him, he hadn’t stopped bothering him. And when Logan ignored him, he sang. Loudly. “I’m trying to work here.”

“It’s Friday,” Roman said. “I’m half dead, you’re the only one that can see me, it’s your boyfriend’s fault I’m like these and our theatre production got canceled.” He listed, tossing in the air. “So, no. I cannot stop.”

“It’s not Virgil’s fault, he didn’t even touch the mug.” Logan said, focusing back on his homework. Or trying to, because Roman couldn’t just shut up.

“Yeah, well, he sounded pretty much like he planned it up when you left us alone!” Roman said. “Like, he told me just to die already or something like that!”

“Yeah, sure, whatever you say…” Logan said.

Roman placed himself between Logan and his homework. “Why won’t you believe me?”

“Because, A, you have no proof, B, I love and trust Virgil, and C, you. Aren’t. Real.”

Roman gasped. “Well, A, I’m telling you, as a witness, B, you just met Virgil a week ago, and C, what am I if I’m not real?”

“A hallucination caused by the stress of the situation, the guilt I’m feeling and the overwhelming feelings of lack of control.” Logan said. Roman had to reckon that sounded smart. “Now stop singing the Phantom of the Opera.”

Roman grumbled and crossed his arms. “Fine.”

A few minutes passed.

“You have to understand the way I am, mein Herr. A tiger is a tiger, not a lamb, mein Herr.”

“Stop.” Logan said. “And what musical is that?”

“Cabaret, duh.” Roman said. “It’s Dee’s favourite.”

“Great.” Logan said. “Please stop singing.”

“Oh, come on, that’s boring” Roman said. “You don’t even have music on. Who does homework without music on?”

“Any normal person?” Logan said.

“Ok, I’ll stop singing.” Roman said. Logan sighted in relief. “If,” And with that Logan cursed. “You sing for me. I don’t care if it’s Erik’s bullshit, or whatever music you like, just sing.”

“Why must you insist on me singing?” Logan said.

Roman gestured widely with his arms. “Because your voice! It’s pretty! And you don’t appreciate it enough!”

“Tell me, Roman” Logan said. “As it seems you’re so interested in my voice, why did you chose to be Meg Giry?”

“What?” Roman said, confused at the change of topic. “What does that have to do with this?”

“You keep telling everyone to go for the big roles, to be confident on themselves.” Logan pushed his chair away from the table, looking at Roman. “So, why did you chose a low role such as Meg?”

“Well, I told you, the only other role left was the Phantom. And I really don’t feel like kissing family on stage.” Roman explained.

“What about Carlota?” Logan said. “You know nobody wanted Heather in the production. Or one of the managers? Or even Christine, you have the biggest range!”

Roman avoided Logan’s gaze, scratching his arms. “Deceit needed the confidence boost that implied being the main protagonist, and I was not going to steal Remus’s favourite role.” He said. “So what if I get a minor role? Everyone’s happier anyways.”

“Roman, you’re an idiot” Logan said rubbing his temples.

“Ouch, really inspiring there, Specs.”

“You are a music genius, yet an idiot.” Logan said. “You deserve a main role as much as any of your brothers.”

“I’m not a genius, I’m a dumb ass.” Roman complained.

“You adjusted every role to the student’s range and taught me how to actually portray emotions on stage.” Logan pointed out. “So yes, you are a genius.”

Roman smiled. “Jeez, thanks. Although it doesn’t matter now the theatre club is over.”

“Look, you’re going to wake up from the comma in about a week.” Logan said. “You’ll probably won’t be able to talk. Let’s not talk about singing. Why don’t we start making our own play about a mute kid instead? I can research some ASL, and you can come up with the plot…”

“YES!” Roman exclaimed, and Logan was relieved he was the only one with the ability of hearing him, or his parents would’ve been concerned. “Yes! Logan, yes! God, I love you!”

Logan laughed. “Love you too.” He turned to his homework. “Now, stop singing and let me work.”

It had been a few hours, and Logan was convinced Roman was asleep now. If ghosts could be asleep. Either he was, or he was levitating over his bed, while staying very quiet and very still.

Something Roman wasn’t usually capable of doing.

Despite the absence of noice, Logan wasn’t able of concentrating. It was six o’clock, he still had time. But he just wanted to focus.

Then the doorbell rang. He ignored it and continued trying.

Moments later, his mother opened the door to his room, still refusing to knock as Logan had asked her a few thousand times.

“Your friend is here.” She said. “He’s saying something about a group project you two needed to finish… You didn’t tell me about any group project.”

“I, eh, must have forgotten to comment it.” Logan said, trying not to anger his mother any further. She had not being pleased when he told her about the party disaster. “I apologize. Won’t happen again.”

His mother hummed and left.

“We don’t have any group projects, do we?” Roman said, rubbing his eyes as if he had just woken up. “Also, I don’t like your mother.”

“No, we don’t.” Logan said. “And why don’t you like my mom?”

Roman shrugged. “I dunno, she reminds me of Dee’s… Call it intuition, I barely know her.”

Logan rolled his eyes and ignored it.

Then Patton appeared through the frame, knocking on the opened door.

“May I come in? I’m a vampire, I can’t come in without permission…” He said, smiling.

Logan rolled his eyes and waved at him to enter. Patton did so, closing the door.

“Ok!” Patton said, taking of his school bag and jumping in excitement. “So, here’s the plan. You” He pointed at Logan. “Are clearly stressed out about Roman’s situation. So, I, your bestest friend in the world, am going to help you, while also getting work done!”

Logan smiled fondly. “What’s the plan?”

“We’re gonna watch a short documentary to relax, because you my friend need it. Then you’re explaining maths to me, because I don’t understand shit and you understand things better when you explain them to someone dumber. Then after math we take a snack break and move on with geography.”

“God, I hate geography.” Logan complained.

“I know, kiddo, I know. That’s why, when we finished, you get a jar full of crofters.” Patton said, patting his bag to show where it was. “Because I know your father thinks they’re unhealthy, but you’re already addicted.”

“You drive a hard bargain.” Logan said, feeling hungry just at the thought of crofters.

“I know.” Patton said, pulling his computer out. “Now, documentary time!”

They sat on his bed, shoulders bumping and legs intertwined. Roman looked from above, having nothing better to do.

And if Logan ate all the crofters jam while doing geography, well, whatever it took to get him through that hideous subject.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Leave a comment if you want to raise my self esteem.
> 
> (Also, I can't guarantee when the next chapter will come out because I either write a full chapter in a few hours or just stop writing for... months or so? Sorry not sorry)

**Author's Note:**

> Well, as always, just slap me in the face if you see a typo. English isn't my native language and yadi yadi yada... You know the drill.  
> Hope you liked it!


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